Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy What to discuss in before school conference?

So, DS6 is going into first grade in two weeks. Last year, in K, he spent about 1/3 of the year going up to 2nd grade for math and reading and the rest of the time his K teacher differentiated for him to that grade level while still in his K classroom. His K teacher was wonderful and we really feel like he got a lot out of the year socially and that he did get some things out of it academically, but not a lot. While he was in the second grade classroom we went from "he's doing fine" to "he's in over his head" back to "he's doing fine" and eventually to him acting up and deciding he didn't like anything at all (reading, math, science, ANYTHING...) at which point we put him back into K but with mostly 2nd grade instruction. At one point his long term sub teacher told us that she had figured out that if he appeared to be struggling with something and the teacher tried to intervene to help him he would just shut down but that if they left him to his own devices that he would figure it out on his own.

We (all of us- parents, school, DS) aren't exactly sure where he should be this year, what he really knows, or what, exactly, to do with him. The director of the school did say that she would like to have DS take the state standardized tests (NWEA MAP) in September to see exactly what he knows and what he doesn't. I think that is a good start but am wondering what else should I be thinking about or asking for in this conference. For example, I saw that someone else had mentioned asking the teacher to limit the "he's so smart" comments in class and there's a lot of discussion about pretesting on here. I think these are both things that I would like to request but wondering if anyone else has any other thoughts along these lines.

Have you thought of a grade skip? Since he has already done 2nd grade materials in kindy, he should be doing 3rd grade materials this year. In our experience, it becomes harder to differentiate when your kiddo is so far ahead. In kindergarten, there were other things to learn, like how to do the full-day school thing and get along with 24 other kids, but 1st grade is more about academics, and if your kiddo already has the entire 1st grade academic stuff down, then it may be a very difficult year, for your son and for the teacher. It would be easier for the 2nd grade teacher to differentiate. Can you find a copy of the Iowa Acceleration Scales?

The MAP will be good. I would ask for your kiddo to take it with the 2nd or 3rd graders, so the school can clearly see the comparison about what your kiddo knows, and hopefully place him with kids with similar scores.

I didn't go back to read other threads, so I'm sorry if this has all been discussed before.

May be that is an extreme abstract/top-down thinker. Nothing makes much sense outside of the larger context or in a meaningless context. Or believing everything is inherently more complex than given. And complexity generally increases as grades go up.

e.g.
Q: If Mary picks 3 apples and Billy picks 5 pineapples, how much fruit do they have together.
A: I can't tell you how many fruit they have until you tell me where they live that has both apples and pineapples growing together.
...or the divergent thinker...
A: That's ridiculous; apples grow on deciduous trees.
...or thinking too much...
A: 11.5 (pounds)

OMiGosh-- I had no idea that other kids did that, too. LOL. My DD was very likely to select items B and C above in some combination, depending on her mood at the time. Generally B is deliberate snark, coming from her, and is often in response to work that is ridiculously trivial from her perspective.


MoN has just described my DD to a tee.


We used to call that phenomenon "quantum jumping" and it made homeschooling DD a nightmare. She'd--without warning-- make these leaps OUT of material (a full years' worth of curriculum, I mean), and forcing her to keep working through it at that point was... just.... oooooooooo- awful.


Once we stepped back out of the ensuing power struggle, it was clear that what had seemed kinda fun/novel for her for a few weeks was simply no longer any kind of meaningful for her, and she went into full refusal mode.



We've also referred to her as "Goldilocks" for her narrow proximal zone and intolerance for being pushed out of it. (That is worth doing anyway, btw, and it does get better with time...)

OMG!!! That was DD9 at that age TO A TEE.

(Almost to a tee - replace "shut" down with "melt" down). If left alone she could work out anything, but if, heaven FORBID, you dared to interrupt her train of thought/processing methodology you'd be in BIG BIG BIG trouble. (BIG trouble).

Not sure how I made it through those years with my nerves intact. Anyway.

A-hem... sorry. Back to the thread topic...

Sigh... that's me. An apparently simple question will have SO many possible answers that I'll a) get overwhelmed and my brain will seize up like an engine out of oil, or b) I'll start talking and the next thing I know my husband will have said "Are you STILL talking?" and the kids (the curious ones!!) will have left the room and my husband will say "and yet you're still talking!"

MoN and Howler- OMG, do you guys hit the nail on the head. It's not about WHAT he knows. It's about HOW he knows it! He doesn't learn like other kids. He "gets" concepts long before he has any idea that there are rules behind it. For example, last year he "learned" place values- he couldn't tell you that, in 3487, the number 4 was the hundreds spot. Yet he could round to the nearest hundred, tens, or thousands. WHY did he know this? I have no clue! His math curriculum was largely based on Everyday Math and he HATED it! Much of the time he spent trying to keep all of their different algorithms straight and ended up getting many questions wrong that he could do even before the school year started.
Howler- the "quantum jumping" that you described? That's it almost exactly! I just am not sure how to let the new teacher know all of this and what I can ask her, in reality, to do about it. I think I am definitely going to ask for pre-tests and I really like the idea of having her keep the "he's the smart one" language to a minimum. I think we will also need to have a plan for what he can do if he is finished before the other students on particular items. I also thought about asking if he can try more typing/keyboarding as his actual thoughts are much more complex than his writing allows him to express. I guess I don't know what else is really worrying me but it seems like something is.