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when I was 11 I walked 45 minutes in one of the worst areas of town to an activity, generally after dark. Mostly this was because my parents couldn't prevent me, but anyway. I got followed once. Another guy got mugged on the same route, but he did a fake karate stance and te guy ran away.

The post-script, though, is that my parents lost controle of me pretty completely by 10 or 11 because one of them was overprotective, and I was Not Impressed.

-Mich

I think it very much depends upon where you live. We have moved several times and have lived in very different neighborhoods. In my last house, I drove or followed my ds on his bike to his friend’s house - it simply was not safe for a number of reasons. Where I live now - he rides by himself all the time. (Helmut is a must and the law where we live. We also have a “family cell phone” that goes in the bike basket. Though, I do have to get him to turn it on.) It also depends upon the child. Is he safety first, fun second or fun first, safety second?

I am fortunate (I think) to run with a group of parents who are very free-range. For this group, I am on the cautious side. I am VERY careful about water and I insist on carseats and helmets for bikes and scooters. Other than that, I am pretty lax. I am really struggling with whether to let DD be more free-range in our neighborhood, which is sort of an edge area to a small city and does have some transients/homeless folks passing through pretty regularly. At the same time, it is a pretty safe family area and I have never heard of ANY assaults.

We have a great climbing tree in the front yard.

I think it's important to note that most kid are abused or killed by someone they know. Not that stranger-danger isn't an issue.

We lost a child two years ago, and trying to forget how random death and tragedy is has become my daily struggle. We can do everything right and still go wrong.

I'm so terribly sorry, Evemomma.

Thank you.

Annette...I believe an underidentified contributor to childhood obesity is leant to the fact most kids don't have the freedom to roam and adventure that we had.

In 1980, when I was a 10-yo free ranger, I was stalked and followed through the mall by an adult male, all the way outside. Had I not been meeting up my mother outside at the time, I'm not sure what would have happened. But seeing her there emboldened me to turn around and ask the guy why he was following me, at which point he left.

I did not have stranger-danger training, so the experience was more awkward than scary.

According to meganslaw.ca.gov, there is one registered sex offender within two miles of our current house. There are 28 within two miles of the house I grew up in. It was a nice neighborhood.

Even in my old slow neighborhood with its wide streets, I remember seeing a girl get hit by a car at the end of my street. Another friend in 6th grade got seriously injured by a car and was out all of 7th, returning in 8th with crutches and slurred speech.

Statistically, cars are my real worry when my children are out. Drunk drivers, texting drivers, angry girlfriends/boyfriends speeding through neighborhoods in 4,000-pound bullets. I let DD8 go around the block now on her scooter and I still can't relax until I see her.

Remember, though, that the threshold for sex offender registration is fairly low (eg, statutory rape--18yo having sex with a 16yo...I think this counts?). I think the website may give at least some details on the crime, however. Also remember that the VAST majority of sex offenders know their victims. Your physical proximity to a sex offender truly may not matter in the slightest if that person has never met your child.

The other thing is...we never hesitate to put our kids in the car and drive them somewhere, right? I have never known ANYone who restricted car travel due to fear of car accidents. But statistically, if we really wanted to keep our kids safe, we would limit car travel with them as much as possible. Car accidents are the #1 cause of accidental death and injury of children and teens.

Now you do . I agree that reducing time spent in a car reduces accidents, and I do keep it in mind. I don't drive to work in the city partly for safety reasons, and I lean toward teaching my children math myself or online with EPGY or AOPS etc. rather than a math school partly for that reason. People may not often articulate safety as a reason not to drive because it sounds gloomy, but the consideration may still be affecting their decisions.

I have put limits on who is allowed to drive my kids..but this of course is a fallicy.

I try to define for myself what is preventable and what is not. Drowings are the number one cause of death in toddlers, and thus I can help prevent this tragedy by never leaving my DD2 alone in baths or outside in proximity to water. Preventing my child from car accidents is much more imposing on our lives, so I accept the risks. Statistics mean nothing on a micro level. My best friend lost her 6 year old son in his sleep 4 years ago due to dometbing called "sudden unexplained deatb in,childhood" (like SIDS for kids/teens). We hVe another great friend who nearly died when an F2 tornado pulled the roof off her bedroom last year. What are the odds that we are all best friends before our tragedies? I probably couldn't
count so high. But we sometimes make the dark joke that we a very dangerous to befriend.