Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Giftedness and hygene

Ugh I have a 5.5yr old who can't reliably remember to go to toilet before it's a desperate rush that offs involves leaking, who forgets to wash her hands and will go straight from eating with her hands to the piano, etc. It drives mencrazy and I live in fear of how this will evolve... She was such an amazingly tidy, organized toddler too.

Perhaps time to reread the Executive Function Resources. I am feeling better that she is not the only one in this situation. I was talking to my Mom about this. She said that my older brother who is gt had similar issues. He is now a successful man and minds his hygene just fine, but the teen years and through college were difficult.

haha! I have one of those! It wasn't until the middle of first grade that "accidents" became infrequent, but she manages to go to school and sleep away camp, etc and has never come home to tell me there was a problem so there's hope yet

My younger brother was like this and he still managed to get married once, then divorced (not due to his hygiene) and now has had a serious gf for 8 years or so...there's always hope

DD is the same. She'd never pick up after herself, shower or brush her teeth if we didn't make her. I get the feeling she just doesn't think about it. She likes to shower/bathe once she's doing it, but getting there just interrupts other 'stuff'. DD is only 6 so perhaps our approach is a little easier at this age, but I just set a time she has to have washed by and if it's not done I just don't engage with her till it is - which works in our instance because she is my shadow, so not having my attention is a 'big deal' (also, because this can drag out, she washes in the evening so we're not doing it at the last minute before school). And I only make her do it every second day unless she is grubby or has been sweaty (tooth brushing every day, obviously).

With her room I leave it because dd doesn't play in there much so it doesn't get too bad and we do a big clean together every month or two. She has to pack up her things in other parts of the house though, or miss out on privileges.

She does need reminding every time though, It wouldn't even occur to her to do it off her own bat (having said that, last night I came out to the lounge and she'd pack up the board game we'd been playing - I nearly fell over in shock!).

Sorry I don't really have any advice - just thought I'd mention you're not alone!

I am adding to my original thoughts as I send DDs off to get ready for bed. DD8 has touch sensitivities (tags, socks, jeans, etc.) and she HATES the feeling of soap bubbles - whether it is hand soap, shampoo or toothpaste. If she could she would simply do rinse off and avoid all cleaning products. She understands their use and importance, but she can't get past the feel of the bubbles on her skin. She is getting better at toughing it out, but mostly it takes either DH or I standing there making sure she does what she needs to do.

Kerry there is rarely a need for soaps and detergents on children. We use a very mild tasting low suds toothpaste and the kids only use soap on their bodies if thy are greasy a d shampoo their hair once a week after swimming to get the chlorine out. As their bodies start producing oils it will get trickier but for now the main suds in their life are for hand washing.

We also clean the house with Enjo products, we use very few chemicals in our house and thus avoid all the chemical smells and heavy perfumes.

Kerry-have you tried Dr Bronner's products? they are all natural, environmentally safe and have almost no suds...

Mumof3 - She only has to wash her hair about 2x a week, it is very long, so it tends to need to be washed at least that often. She also has an amazing attraction to dirt (it finds her at lightning speed, whether she is looking for it or not ), so we really don't make her use soap all the time, with the exception of her hands. Most of us are sensitive to smelly stuff, so the soap we use has no fragrances either.
2giftgirls - no, I've not heard of them, I'll look them up.

Yep, I'll also add that you're not alone Haven't found too many solutions. Special/dedicated products help sometimes, as does sharing showers/baths sometimes. And sometimes I just have to put my big fat foot down and insist!!

jojo