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Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,691 Likes: 1
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I don't want to offend anyone's faith here but this is a real question.
We discuss how our kids like to research stuff right? Well, since DH and I were both raised Catholic and DD turned 7, a mother mentioned "was DD taking first communion this year?" And we decided to go for it, as a cultural thing.
Since we just started 2 weeks ago and she missed last year, we are doing remedial stuff and she has to do a quiz for every section. A bit hard for me since I didn't go to Catholic school and had 3 Cathecism classes before my first communion, but there is all this Creation stuff and Father and Son stuff. But what really is hard is the contradiction. Like there is a prayer that says that you will not call anyone father on earth, it is reserved for God, yet (aside from fathers) we always called the priest father etc. And if you really start to research, which DD is a little young for, but how the church developed, Paul being a very good marketer, the real research, you see it was developed more to control populations. And how do you explain these things while still letting her pass the tests to get her first communion?
Part of me wants her to understand religion like any subject and you have to first understand why people believe. And please, I do have faith, just not the religious doctrine associated with any one faith. But like any holiday festival, it is a nice tradition.
Contradiction of desires and thoughts here for DD. Appreciate anyone who has experience or input.
Ren
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interesting...
I too do not want to offend, but I tend to say things that sometimes do so, anyway...
I was raised Catholic, went to Catholic school until 6th grade. DH is from rural Vermont, never went to any church or practiced any organized religion. We are raising our children without religion, but DD4.5 does go to a Christian school where they start the day with a Bible story...one of the happy Jesus types though, not the gloom and doom kind...
Last year, DD was in a similar spot, with friends making the FC. She had also just finished reading all the Percy Jackson books. One day, I go to volunteer in the classroom and one of the kids asks me "Why does Butter hate God?" Of course, I am shocked by this. "The H word" is something I discourage the use of and I was sure this kid must be mistaken. When Butter's group (most advanced reading group, 4 of 5 tested gate last year) comes to me, I ask her about it and this starts a religious discusson in which SDMom's son, Mr B, says he had FC when he was 2 (I think he is mistaken until I find out later they go to a Christian church where all comers can take communion-had to explain what FIRST Communion was)...I would say ALL religions are represented well in our school, but the use of hate bothered me... When I ask the child about it later, at home, she tells me she actually said "God is boring and we should go back to worshipping the Greek gods. They were far more interesting." After I recover from laughing, I explain to her how some of her friends take their faith/religious beliefs very seriously. I did at that age. I think her friends were disturbed that they might not see her in heaven, that she has to be careful about what she says sometimes (is it any wonder the kids tells me she feels different? sigh)
Is your daughter asking questions or is this mostly your dilemma? If she is not questioning, but accepting, then I would just go with it. I personally see the Bible itself similar to a book of fairy tales (again-no offense meant!) that are meant to guide people in decision making...stories of "look what happens when you are cruel to others" and things like that. If she is questioning, I would probably take that to your catechism teacher...I think it has a lot to do with your DD's personality too...is she a "head down" kind or the kind that stands out? Is she likely to pose a question in class that leads to a full on theological debate?
Last edited by 2giftgirls; 11/06/11 04:18 AM. Reason: typo
I get excited when the library lets me know my books are ready for pickup...
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I think religion is a difficult subject for any gifted child in any religion. We, too, are Catholic and although we attend regularly, both DH and I have our own issues with many parts of the religion. That being said, I find great comfort in the rituals associated with my religion and this is what I focus on when conversing with DD9. I don't have to agree or believe with everything that is spouted... I focus on the parts I believe with all my heart and skim over all the rest. A lot like I did in school!
DD has had some pretty great questions over the years and now has our priest's email address so she can direct the big ones to him (this was his idea after being accosted by her a few times). She just had her bible presentation three weeks ago and is trying hard to read it... but the small type makes it difficult for a dyslexic child to read. I love that she is interested, but I too fear some of the conversations we are going to have in the coming years. Can't wait til she starts learning about evolution....
Tomorrow is always fresh, with no mistakes in it. — L.M. Montgomery
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DD went to St. Ignatius for K, because it used to be a great Jesuit school and would accelerate but now the principal is Irish Catholic and is turning it into a 1960s Irish Catholic school, so we left.
She hated going to "God's House" when she was at St. Ignatius. She doesn't seem to mind this church, though we have only gone twice so far and she has 2 school friends in the Sunday school and since she is in the grade 1 class, she gets cupcakes each week.
As I try and explain the concepts and how religion came to be, though I want her to learn what they want her to know, DH thinks she won't pass the quiz with my explanations. I teach her that 100s of years ago people were not educated and these guys wanted to build a church based on good teachings so they had to create a way to teach these people and answer their questions and they just got stuck in the church, despite the fact we know so much more.
She just likes the idea of FC so she can eat in church...
Ren
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can I just take this moment to say that I used to try to hold the host in my mouth until church was over...I always thought it might explode or something if I crossed the threshold with it, lol!
I get excited when the library lets me know my books are ready for pickup...
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And we decided to go for it, as a cultural thing. What does this mean, actually?
Last edited by ColinsMum; 11/06/11 07:25 AM. Reason: decided to be a coward
Email: my username, followed by 2, at google's mail
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I have a friend who's culturally Jewish, but not a religious one. I don't know if you can actually participate in church and call it not religious. Some people go just for the holidays, but it's a religious act. I guess you could be religious without buying the dogma. (btw "Dogma" is a very funny, sac religious movie that deals with that issue. It's got Chris Rock and stars Selma Hayek as a pg-rated stripper and Matt Damen.) uh, I guess you don't want your seven year old watching it if you don't want her even painting her fingernails yet. It's even got a poop-daemon called an "excremental". The pope is played by George Carlin. I hope I'm not out of line. I just wanted to share because I thought it was the funniest movie ever written.
Youth lives by personality, age lives by calculation. -- Aristotle on a calendar
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Ok, a more thoughtful answer. Where you live is the melting pot with a lot of diversity. My Jewish friend dates a Buddhist guy whose best friend is a Catholic. Her BFF is a Hindu from India. Me, I'm an atheist whose family says to call it non-denominational and say "I'm still seeking", although my open minded dad would "ok" me saying "secular humanist". I say I'm an apethist, it doesn't have any meaning in my life. My FB BFF has her religious views on Facebook written LOVE, her political views written as LOVE. Bueno. I'm saying if you want to culturally give her Catholic roots without having her buy the dogma then maybe you could visit a few other religious clergy and ask for the cliffs notes to their religions. There's several buddhist monasteries in Woodstock. I've heard that their service involves sitting and meditating quietly. I'm sure you can find a synagogue. The you can discuss what religion means to people abstractly without throwing her off on her catechism.
Youth lives by personality, age lives by calculation. -- Aristotle on a calendar
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La Tex called it pretty well. It is part of where we come from, like being Polish or Italian.
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Oh, I can related to this issue well. Both my husband and I were raised Catholic. From generations of Catholics before us! My parents were and continue to be cultural Catholics. Actually DH's parents are that way too. They participate in their church community but are not literal practicing Catholics.
Anyway, in looking for somewhere to marry we found a UU church (Unitarian Universalist). We were really just looking for a building. My DH is divorced and I was quite opposed to buying off the Catholic church for an annulment (his first marriage was a young, short, no kids marriage). But we found a community where we be involved without any particular dogma, pulling our "cultural Catholcism" along with us.
What has been a particularly good fit is the Sunday school program. It is designed to get kids thinking and asking questions, and works great for GT kids (very open ended). This has been an excellent solution for us. The kids get exposed to all major religions respectfully.
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