Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Computer games/TV time

We have a similar approach to ABQMom. DD has days where she just needs to veg and she'll have a few hours screen time over the course of a day, but a good majority of the time she has very little interest in screens at all. She'll turn something on only to switch it off 15 minutes later. We kind of go with the flow. I agree with Dude too, that screen time limits are more about ensuring kids are getting their social and physical needs met - which dd definitely does.

No hard limits here either, although I will tell DS he's had enough computer time for the day sometimes. During the week he has no time to spend on screens anyway (except what we do together on my laptop on the bus!) We don't have TV (just DVD and computers), which I feel helps, in that anything he's watching/doing can be done another day, so telling him to stop it for now isn't a huge deal.

I generally recommend avoiding computer games generally, as that was possibly the activity that was most destructive to my life, being that it was the only thing I basically did from age 14(?) to 26. Granted, I did do other things, such as high school activities, but getting into the habit of doing it all the time, and then going to college, where there were no external restraints, was a real problem.

TV is mostly a waste of time, too.

We do not limit but our kids seem to monitor themselves with their screen time. Some days they are all about it, some days they could care less and are interested in anything but the glowing screen, just out being boys. They rarely stay doing one thing for an extended period of time when its computer/game/tv involved...the newness of whatever they've found wears off and off they go to something else one of the other children are doing.
I've seen strict regulation of TV end up badly in the young adult years when the parents no longer have rein....on the flip side I've seen kids get addicted to the glowing screen as well from overuse and continue that behavior into adulthood...I think that is more to do with types of personality than anything, some people have a more addictive type personality than others and it shows up in many ways. Its a parental choice, and what you think is best for your kids, as you know them best sorta answer.

We didn't have a TV for about 5 years. And that has made all the difference.
My dc's couldn't care less about it.

I wouldn't recommend avoiding computer games entirely, though. As a tool for training mental agility and flexibility, I don't think they can be beat. "Here's an entirely alien environment that operates on a whole different set of rules from anything you've encountered before... go!"

Rather seeing the lack of ability to self entertain a reason to have more electronics, I would suggest instead it is a reason to have less. Learning to self engage, handle frustration, handle boredom, enjoy day dreaming, etc. are all important life skills and the development of those skills can be interfered with by ready access to electronics. Consuming electronics isn't a hard fought skill, the games and software are designed to keep the child attentive and pressing next. It is at the very core a passive activity.

While I don't at all think preschool is mandatory, interacting with the world is. For a preschooler that can be stuff like: going to the post office, taking walks, going to the park, going to library story time, etc.

While he needs your attention he doesn't always need your full attention. It is appropriate to expect preschoolers to handle some divided attention (like you are feeding the baby while semi paying attention to him while he builds with trains or whatever). Also, not everything needs to be a child centered entertainment activity. He can help make sandwiches, help wipe off the table, etc.

Forever kids have been making up their own imaginary worlds with different rules. They create it from scratch, they live it, they destroy it. Playing has been the world where many of us learned these skills and gained motor skills and sensory awareness all at the same time.

I do agree with what you are saying.

I don't know what he is thinking, if any, when he is laying around. I don't want him to tune out when he is bored.

If the kid makes up the rules, then the kid can change the rules. They can't do that in the real world, they have to adapt to the environment they find themselves in, and develop strategies that work within it. Computer games stimulate those cognitive processes.

And then, they can go outside, imagine their own world, and gain sensory awareness and motor skills, because nobody here proposed the child should be sitting in front of World of Warcraft all day.