Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion o/t 9/11

Isn't it amazing how gentle our sons can be with us at times? My son also has moments when I'm trying to shield him from something, and he turns around and tries to gently introduce me to the cold facts of life. Amazing boys!

Oh, it's not that I don't plan to discuss it with my kids--I certainly will--but she is a really sensitive and anxious little person sometimes and I am not sure she's ready for this one just yet. War has been coming onto her radar screen and that's really tough for her as well. She has already decided that we need to leave the south ASAP due to its role in the Civil War. I mean, I wink there, but it's really bothering her.

We have talked to our boys about it over the years, especially because due to the attacks DH has served overseas multiple times being Army an all. While we weren't directly connected to anyone in the area of the attacks, our lives were forever changed being an army family after that day as well. We didn't feel like we could explain why DH is always gone without including some information about 9/11.

Yes. My son recently got some very bad news. His painful brace doesn't seem to be working well enough. We are being referred to a pediatric orthopedic surgeon. They may recommend a surgery that has a high complication rate. He has read some of this. There is a risk of neurological damage and death.

He took the news better than I expected at least on the outside but his blood pressure went way up. He has always tried to hide his anxiety. He somehow manages to laugh and tell jokes to ease the tension instead of crying and tries his best to get me from getting upset. When we went to eat afterward I was too busy trying to hold back tears to eat and he told his dad that he had tried everything he knew to get my mind off of the bad news. He suggested that his dad start singing in the restaurant in front of all the lunch crowd and he did and it was so ridiculous that my tears turned to laughter and we all got through it. Humor and laughter sometimes is the best medicine.

When we went home I found out that my mother was getting much worse and my dad couldn't get her to eat or drink and they had to take her to the hospital by ambulance. She is not expected to live much longer. This all started with complications from a minor surgery.

I thought of my son's "sometimes not everyone can be okay" often, especially when his little friend drowned about six months after 9/11 and couldn't be revived, when my husband was given a 50/50 chance of beating cancer (he did, thankfully but we went through lots of stress when he had checkups to see if cancer had returned) and when my mother suffered devastating complications of "minor" surgery. I can't get those words out of my mind. Sometimes not everyone can be okay.

I am spending hours online looking for alternative treatments for scoliosis and then trying to act normal and manage homeschooling when my son is awake.

I will not turn on the television today. I don't think I can take it.

Lori H. - hugs to you and yours.

[Sorry, posted the quote by itself just now!]

I can relate. I read a slave narrative to my class the other day. It was particularly painful to me because it took place in the town where I grew up, which was too small to have a high school or a post office.

There are sad chapters of history for every location, but recounting all of those may be opening a pandora's box. Eventually, I had to come to a place where I recognized those dark chapters as well as some really positive things that Southerners have done.

Then, I left the South, but that's beside the point.

I told my sixth graders the story of a Pentagon cop I knew who was a hero on 9/11/01. The story of one person instead of thousands is easier for humans of all ages to process. We spoke of death without focusing on it.

Thank you. My 13-year-old son was with us last night to be with my mother when she took her last breath. It was a very hard thing to watch. She had pneumonia and it looked like she was fighting to breathe and very uncomfortable for a while but she looked very peaceful at the end after the family held hands around her and said a prayer. She took her last breath when we said amen. Again, my son handled things very well on the outside and focused on helping me get through it. I don't know what I would do without this kid.

Lori - many hugs to you and your family and prayers during this incredibly hard time.

Plus, with the civil rights era of the 60's the former South is essentially gone.

It just lives in books now.