We had a meeting at DD8's school yesterday to discuss ideas for her IEP. Her psychologist was present as well as many of the support staff at the school. While I was blown away by how supportive everybody seemed, my husband and I were a little surprised that the psychologist focused so much on DD's anxiety. We knew from previous meetings with her and a few one-on-one sessions that her perfectionism was serious impediment to her school work. It has always been an issue and has held her back from demonstrating her capabilities. The psychologist strongly suggested that we focus on first providing a supportive environment and strategies that she can employ to overcome her fear of making mistakes. She thought that any form of enrichment would be for naught until we can get her to the point that she feels comfortable attempting the easy work.
I am happy that everyone was recognizing how hard it is for DD in school (even picking up a pencil to write a sentence is stressful for her because she can't cope when her letters do not look perfect), but I am also disappointed for her because I know that it is going to be torturous for her to sit through the 'easy' stuff. We were really hoping that we would talk about the anxiety AND enrichment at this meeting but now we have to wait until November to discuss subject acceleration and the IEP will be incomplete until then. I wish the psychologist had let us know that she was going to focus only on the anxiety.
We came up with a few ideas for helping DD with her anxiety (establishing a way of communicating with the teacher without drawing attention to herself, taking a few minutes break from the activity and using positive self-talk, going to talk to the resource teacher or VP when she felt very overwhelmed, etc.). Hoping someone can offer other suggestions?
On the plus side, DD was so relieved that people are finally understanding how she feels. She said that she cried when the teached took her aside at recess and talked to her, because it felt so good to have people want to help her.
I should also note that DD will have ongoing sessions with her psychologist.
