Just to be clear the suggestion wasn't that you yell at him for waking you up. Rather, that one of the things that may help him ultimately feel better and less afraid is if he develops more independence and competence. ALL people feel anxiety. ALL people face difficult parts of life. Yes, some more than others and life isn't fair. But, we've all got to find a way to play the hand we were dealt without being trapped in a place of feeling like we are mistreated or hopeless.
One of the best ways to decrease anxiety is to find ways to effectively deal with moods and to feel greater control. Also, as we all know there is a huge mind body connection and unresolved anxiety can play out in chronic pain symptoms.
There will be a time when he will no longer want to rely that his only way to cope is to wake up his mom. That is not a model that allows him to develop an appropriate level of independence that will allow him to be able to have new experiences or to individuate. I would look to the future and try to explore other methods to help him develop coping strategies.
