Hi DMR,
The first thing to think about is this: Your daughter is attending a private school to address her academic needs. Are her academic needs truly being adressed? Does she have friends that she can really be herself around?
If your daughter really is 16 intellectally, then her classwork should include the kinds of discussion and idea that would be found in High School - very few schools provide this to 2nd graders - even schools that lable themselves as 'college prep' or 'gifted.'
We used to think that Gifted was one big catagory where all Gifted children had more or less the same needs. Now we are thinking about 'Levels of Giftedness' LOG, and how about 2/3rds of the kids in any gifted program will be hugging that cut off, giving the impression that 'Yes, this program is working for all kids except the one's who aren't trying to make it work.'
When you say that she is lazy, I suspect that she either hasn't met any work that she actually has to work to be able to do OR that she has never learned how to engage with difficult material. Either way, it makes me wonder how much unmet need she is still under.
Love and More Love,
Grintiy
