I didn't have that neighborhood with kids as a child. I moved a lot and rarely kept friends.
I really think he will be fine, and that the move will be worth it. Let's face it - 99% of parents would just say to a child 'You are over-reacting, stop that right now.' So I'm sure you are handling this whole thing with a lot of sensitivity.
For me, there was a whole subtext of 'class issues' that went along with the move. The old neighborhood was filled with modest homes on small lots - all the yards connected in the back and the streets were filled with children of all ages. And I was accepted as 'one of the bunch.'
The new neighborhood was up on a hill, with larger showy homes, no sidewalks, and because the neighborhood was new - very few kids already living there to welcome me. Over the years more families moved in, and I did develop some 'within walking distance' friendships, but the easy comfort of being 'nothing special' never returned. Because of this, I've been able to cherish the many good qualities and advantages of modest backgrounds, and that has enriched my life tremendously. Most of the other kids who grew up in my new neighborhood really bought the lie that they were 'better than' kids from the smaller houses.
In the US there isn't much vocabulary to talk about class differences comfortably - so lots of assumptions never get talked about, or thought about. ((cue Brave New World theme music))
One of the things that made last year sweet was that when DS13 went back to the public school, he made new friends from our town's more 'modest' neighborhood. One of them said to him, after months of friendship, "Hey, you are rich, why do you hang out with us?"
DS13 just rolled his eyes and said: "Because I like you."
I get such a lump in my throat thinking of that story. Somehow I was able to communicate to my son that 'more money' doesn't equal 'more valuable.'
So, yes, moving was very hard on me, but I'm really grateful for what I was able to make out of the experience.
I'm sharing this because I haven't read much about 'trying to find ways to communicate about class issues' in the US parenting magazines. That'll be the day, eh?
Love and More Love,
Grinity
