Well, at least you know she loves you
You might try contacting the davidson institute - I know they work with 6 and up (I think that's the age) but *surely* they will have some resources for the parents of these kids before they hit 6 - your child sounds amazing, but extremely tiring.
Sounds like you need some time off - do you have a partner who can swing in and give you some time off on a regular basis? A couple hour block, I should think, would help you recharge. Also, I would think this will be extremely important for your partner to see the kiddo in action.
We had two other child containment/pacification devices I don't see listed: bouncy sling which hangs from a door, our kids would enjoy this for long periods, sometimes even falling asleep right there. An automated swing - the constant motion was extremely soothing.
Music, music, music.
Soft books with little parts you can in fact separate from the page, we had one called 'my quiet book', the parts are still tied on with tethers but might satisfy your little one a bit better.
good luck, hang in there - keep writing, it might help too
