Originally Posted by BWBShari
The awesome experience we've had with PS has apparently hit it's first bump.

Isn't school an interesting place. All kids get bullied for something. Schools either have a policy in place and handle it well or they don't. The age-difference is the pretext for the bulling, but not the cause. See the difference?

She made a comment regarding "such a small boy and such a large book". DS completely overreacted and kicked her.

Kicking her was innapropriate, but not an overreaction in my book. That's obnoxious. And yeah, we have trouble with substitutes too.

I asked him to clarify and he told me that he's being teased and bullied by a boy in his 4th grade class. He said it's been going on for a couple of weeks. He didn't tell me because he was afraid that I would pull him out of the class and it's his favorite (math)

Awesome that you two have such a good relationship that he can share this! Yippee! ((graphic of the slot machine paying off))

I asked him if he'd said anything to the boy. My DS said that the first time the boy teased him he had said "You're just jealous because I can do your homework, and i'm only 6!" Apparently this just made the kid mad and it's escalated since.

My DS also fell into this trap. He had to learn by experience to avoid this sort of thing. It would be good to practice 'snappy comebacks' that DON'T refer to age or intellectual ability. What the books say is that the only thing that really works is to 'make fun of the tease, not the teaser.' As in 'last time I heard that I fell off my Dinosaur' or 'And?' or 'Do you have any better material?'

Of course the best thing is to get a friend in there to stick up for DS, and to alert the teachers.

I don't know of a child who goes through school without dealing with teasing in one way or another. Usually the child that my son 'locks horns' with is the kid who used to be the 'smartest boy' before he met DS. ((sigh)) Apparently (most) children think in crayon steriotypes, so if a person was 'smartest' or 'fastest' and someone new comes along, they are as threatened as if I lost my job, my family, and my typing skills all on the same day. Identity is a powerful thing.

That's why having the teacher do a unit on 'sticking up for each other' is so important. It gives kids the identity of 'we belong to a strong group and stick together.'

Shari, I wouldn't be celebrating right now, but this is something to embrace. You've done really well so far, and I believe that you will all get through this stronger.

love and more love,

Coaching available, at SchoolSuccessSolutions.com