Is he prone to emotional outbursts, or is this a big departure from his usual personality and M.O.?
Oh Soupy!
I really feel for you!
I think that Kriston's comment is excellent. I'm also curious if you-all have talked about homeschooling as an option. Are there any private schools around that are a possible better fit.
Is the work he is bringing home anywhere near a challenge for him? If is isn't, then the extra strain of more writing demands may not be worth it for him, at least short term. Some parents have found that after the first gradeskip, actual accomidations that work for the child, such as additional subject accelerations, online class substitution, or partial homeschooling are much, much easier to get.
If the work is actually challenging, intellectually, then expect to hear lots of emotional words as you child gets used to 'reality.' This was my son's case with a mid-year skip from 5th to 6th. It took two years and a school change for him to reverse his Underachievement and get to know himself well enough for school to actually be fun as well as a good learning experience. Yes, there were plenty of moments when he begged me to Home School him, because going in there a facing what he had to face was a big heavy thing.
One thing that used to work in our house was eating pomegranets. (I'm a stranger to spelling too!) He and I would sit down and pick, eat, and squirt our way through half a pomegranet and I would hear him process a lot of cool thoughts. Then I didn't have to be in a state of panic over there being trouble and me not knowing what it is. We've also had several good heart-to-heart listens over DS12 making his special hand mashed guacamole.
I know that when children enter school, some of them (mine, at the least) get the message that it is 'bad' to be little and 'good' to be a big kid, and that being a big kid is a privalege that must be earned through suffering through each of the grades. Subject accelerations didn't work for my son in 4th grade, because he always projected that the other kids questioned his right to do their special privaleges. Some little boys are amazingly heirarchy-minded. As a female, it's difficult for me to take this as seriously as my DS does, even on an emotional level.
Do you have a personal policy about doing hard things? What lessons would you like your child to learn about sad/hard times? Telling you son stories about your own 'big steps that you didn't feel ready for' and those of family members does help, I believe, if it's after you've listened to him as much as he can, and as long as you introduce the stories that you expect his situation is quite unique. Even hearing that 'Grinity's son' was sad and felt like he had violated some unspoken rule when he first skipped, but that every year he feels more and more at home with his new grade-track might help. I figured that since there weren't many kids around who had gone through what my son had gone through, that it was fair to give him some of the support I get from posting here. You can even encourage him to post here and get some direct support.
I fully intend that by the time my grandchildren go through the school system, all these difficulties will have been figured out. For now, you and me and your son and mine are pioneers of trying to cobble together the best of what's availible. It's a hard road, but, something, I think, to be proud of.
I find it hard to balance between the 'poor baby, tell me more' side of myself, and the 'chin up, this is the best we're going to get! No point dwelling on what can't be.' side of myself. What works pretty well for us, is for me to be upfront about the two sides, and to schedule time for each of them - maybe bathtime for complaining and feeling sorry for ourselves, and the rest of the day for trying to notice what's going well. We gifted folks will always be able to see something better than what is and yearn for it, just as we can learn to appreciate the beauty of what is - so this is a really good skill to develop in the long run.
Bottom Line: I don't know from your description how much of a change is needed, if any.
It is interesting that he isn't begging to go back to his old grade-track. You won't know for a while yet, perhaps not ever, but that isn't what's required. Your job is to do the best you can, and give the style of love that you think is best, and maybe learn from whatever bumps in the road you meet.
Parenting isn't the kind of activity where it's usually possible to ever have a clear, logical view of the whole situation. That's hard to get used to! ((smile))
Love and More Love,
Grinity
