Thank you everyone! This gives me a lot to think about and some great conversation starters with him. I think it will be of great value for me to learn what he DOES want to be recognized for and how he wants to be recognized. I found out that they celebrate the "player of the game" in the locker room and that may be very uncomfortable for him. so far in life, he has been an introvert.
I will think about paying/rewarding him for specific performance. He's more competitive with himself than others. The only other sport I can get him to participate in is cross country.
To answer Mahagogo5's question: Is there anyone who has an unusually negative take on stand out players? I thought back on it and more than likely. there was one player, who was standout, and the comments was never about the player but the parents were almost abusive with the amount of pressure they put on such a young kid. I'll ask him if I need to clarify what we meant when he overheard some of those comments.
All of these comments could apply, and gives me hope that I can find insight to help him overcome his insecurity. Not for him to be a future NHL player but just to be a healthy happy adult.
