I guess it is hard to accept that "meets or exceeds grade level expectations" is going to be where the bar is set. I guess I would kind of expect a gifted kid to be performing well above grade level, unless there is a problem.
One other important way to reframe your discussions with the school - rather than thinking of how *high* your dd should be achieving, what you are seeking is "Fair and Appropriate Public Education" - you want your child to be able to show his/her full knowledge at school. If he/she can't use handwriting, they need to be able to use another method to show their knowledge.
polarbear
