Thinking more about my past practice, I let DD6 choose between 2 preschools when she was 2, because both were acceptable and she could clearly articulate sound reasons for her preference. She was right, as it turns out. I also (unsuccessfully) sought a grade skip for her at her request, with the caveat that testing supported her position. Probably for her I'm a bit afraid to put the question, since what I suspect she wants (and likely needs) will be exceedingly difficult to deliver.
DS8 is a different challenge. He would probably choose to homeschool, given the choice, but I wonder if he thinks he could avoid working on his second E in that scenario. He has historically rejected other school options for the heartbreaking reason that he 'expects it would be worse', but that answer is driven by anxiety. I worry about the 'why' of his choice, but perhaps I'm not giving him enough credit.
I think the three-way vote and monthly meetings are both good ideas - thank you for sharing them.
