LAF, my son can also be pretty anxious. This is the pattern we have noticed:
Big change on the horizon - like moving up a grade or a close friend moving
2-4 weeks out (depending on how much the change is talked up) he will start to have more off task attention issues at school. His teachers will complain he isn't getting his work done, etc. At the same time, the excessive chewing of finger nails and shirt collars starts. At home he'll avoid being alone but will try to cover up the fact. For example, "Go upstairs, and get your shoes" is met with him going upstairs, lingering in the hall and then coming down and saying he couldn't find them and asking for me to go help him look for them. It isn't getting distracted and not following through. When pressed he will admit that he is just too scared to go alone and needs help.
These times are exhausting.
The big change comes and goes, all is well, the nails grow, the collars stay dry and he quits being so clingy at home.
I always assumed this was anxiety. DH and I were anxious kids (I chewed and had stomach aches, he pulled his hair out - literally) and we are very mellow adults.
DS explained to me that he was like our chickens:
When we first got them, the breeder said they might not lay eggs for a while because they would be stressed in their new environment. It took about a week for them to settle in.
He says when he is in a new environment, he is stressed until he figures it all out.
Then, as if he were talking to an idiot, "Mom, you understand I am not saying I am going to start laying eggs. I mean that, like my chickens, it takes me a while to feel comfortable in my environment. When they feel comfortable, they lay eggs. When I feel comfortable, I get my work done and don't get upset so easily."
Yes, dear, I understand. It is called an analogy You use them often.
