Watch out for peer pressure, bullying, general school apathy (including school staff).
Agreed! Some may say school staff (teachers, admins, GT) may be the number one source of negative peer pressure, bullying, and apathy as they may quickly induce guilt/shame for being gifted. This may be done publicly in the classroom, triggering exclusion, objectifying the gifted student, and implying that the gifted student "owes" more than an even division of labor on group work. Other students may feel they have tacit approval for non-performance on group work and may slack off considerably, expecting the gifted student to fill in for them without complaint. The gifted student may then be blamed for poor attitude regarding group work experiences, upon any attempt to discuss the truth of the group dynamics. Learning environments which are moving more quickly to embrace a model guaranteeing equal outcomes may exert greater pressure in this area.
Another source of negativity may be parents who'd like the gifted child as a foil, drawing attention to and highlighting their own child's greater accomplishment/achievement in a particular area. Once again the gifted child is treated as an object, being used for another's purpose, without regard to their own feelings, beliefs, preferences, or strengths.
Underachievement as it relates to motivation and enthusiasm is covered beautifully in the book
A Parent's Guide to Gifted Children. Chapter 4 discusses that
a person is always motivated toward something, however that motivation may not be toward what the parents may like. In the examples above, the child may be motivated toward being regarded as a self-determining person, having some control over their circumstances, not having others ride their back over the finish line. Page 145 in Chapter 6 of
A Parent's Guide to Gifted Children shares:
Gifted children must learn ways to avoid feeling helplessly trapped by their situation.
Remind your DS11 that these people are just temporarily the people around him. His education will stay with him when they're long gone from his life. It's the education that counts.
Agreed. I would add the caveat that the child's education includes what one absorbs from the learning environment: power, politics of the system, and the sense of being objectified may all impact the child's sense of self-worth and have lasting effect on how the individual approaches/avoids situations and interacts with others throughout the lifespan. These sayings come to mind: "Once burned, twice shy"... "Fool me once, shame on you; Fool me twice, shame on me." On a positive note, page 145 of
A Parent's Guide to Gifted Children shares,
They [gifted children] must take an active role in reducing their stress by viewing situations as challenges and as learning experiences.
Long story short, considering the source(s) of underachievement in any particular case may be instrumental to understanding the student and supporting them in creating strategies which will better serve them. I believe others have said and I'll repeat that underachievement is not the
problem but an observable
symptom that there is a problem which needs to be addressed. Underachievement may be a person's maladaptive approach to solving the problem because they do not know a better way to solve it; the kiddo may need help in identifying the underlying problem and support in finding ways to resolve it. This reminds me of the
recent thread on DSH, where one resource related DSH to unresolved conflict.
Am anticipating ugly scenes and needing to meditate *a lot*. I just wish I could feel a little more confident that I'll be able to make a difference.
You may enjoy insights gained from reading the book
A Parent's Guide to Gifted Children. Combined with the BTDT examples from posters on the forum, applied in a way which supports the kiddo, appeals to a kiddo's reasoning, and encourages the kiddo to take charge... may be surprisingly easy to implement and have lasting results: in general they may need to be, feel, and act empowered, not powerless.
