yay, MoN! that's exactly the process we've used with her so far - it helped us make the call about changing schools for the fall, so i think we'll try it again on this question.

and HK - toxic vs. taxing: love it. if you stick with something difficult and feel good about it at the end, it was taxing. if you stick with it and you feel awful in the end, it was toxic. and BONUS: DD loves a pithy saying - so she will be all over that one!

thanks so much!!

Every Sunday it brooded and lay on the floor. Inconveniently close to the drawing-room door.