Although her bio on her practice's website stated that she draws heavily from cognitive behavior therapy, it didn't feel very concrete or practical. Maybe I just had unrealistic expectations for an initial visit. I really thought we'd start from a diagnostic perspective and the "wait and see" is frustrating for me.
I guess I hadn't really thought of anxiety with this kid. She internalizes a lot and has never been able to talk about what she's feeling. Not a talker in general. She tends to explode at home when she's stressed and get quiet at school. Never a hint of separation anxiety or phobias. She's not a worrier about anything except her own performance, so I guess if she thought she was "failing" at talking to the psychologist that might fit.
I know that she said she liked school and her parents, and she drew a few pictures (she replicated pretty exactly one that another kid had done). I guess she could have felt pressure to perform, but I've never seen this kind of behavior before.
Good news is she hasn't been in trouble at school for a while and things at home have been a little quieter. I've also contacted a different psychologist that does evaluations for ASD and she recommended having her observed in the classroom and doing testing to rule out Asperger's. Not sure how I feel about that yet as her teacher already thinks I'm "that mom".