Originally Posted by HowlerKarma
Quote
Was I wrong to say anything? I am really getting the impression that people - teachers and paras, etc. REALLY DO NOT LIKE that DS gets a scribe! I am also getting the impression that really do not like me.

No, you weren't wrong to say something.

Your son is experiencing a hostile learning environment.

That's the phrase that pays here, btw.

I think, though, that your approach is perhaps in need of a tweak, advocacy-wise. Be clear and VERY precise in your wording with this kind of thing. Study the examples of "letters of understanding" at Wrightslaw-- and practice writing one of those for this incident.

a) my son has informed me that {X, Y, and Z}.

b) MY understanding is that {A, B, and C},

and
c) Please correct me if DS or I have misunderstood anything in this account. If I do not hear from you by {reasonable amount of time}, I will assume that this narrative is both complete and accurate. Thanks so much for your help.


Because the bottom line is that you do not know that what your DS said is both completely accurate and exactly what happened... you just SUSPECT (probably with good reason) that it is.

You have to give the appearance of impartiality-- or at least objectivity-- as a show of good faith. But communicating things like this in writing also tells them that you've had enough of this nonsense and you're going to put their feet to the fire as of RIGHT NOW.

They are behaving in a retaliatory fashion. Let them know that such a thing-- you know, IF such an unfortunate thing were ever to :cough-cough: take place-- would be illegal, and grounds for a complaint with OCR. How unfortunate if this "misunderstanding" were to escalate.

Howler, Your point about the letter writing is very good. Thank you. I looked up letters of understanding on Wrightslaw and found this: http://www.wrightslaw.com/advoc/articles/DRAFT_Letters.html Good sample letters - good standard niceties with which to start and end even though you are really registering a complaint, greivance,etc. (even though and when the school doesn't derserve it). I looked over all my old emails and I think mine are still fine. However, I am getting a little too close the "irrate, difficult parent" so once the principal contacts me regarding the resolution of the para comments situation... I will be certain to respond in a pleasant, grateful way that still documents