I guess I would need to know more about his behavior. Is the "shut your mouth" example typical, with excursions into worse behavior? Where I'm heading is, this may be more than just feeling emotions intensely. It may be a problem with behavioral control that needs to be addressed.
With regard to the other parents -- is your son regularly exploding at their children and verbally attacking them? If so, this may actually be their attempt to build bridges to you. It may be that they are trying very hard not to brand you as Evil Parent of Evil Kid and instead are trying to start a dialog with you about it.
That was my thought too. Sounds like you already have a neuropsych on board and have ruled out any developmental disorders? We have seen a lot of this kind of explosive and inflexible behavior in my DS10 who has autism spectrum disorder.
DeeDee
Definitely not typical as far as I know. I had never heard him say those words before. He thinks "shut-up" is a cuss word, so that's why I was so surprised by this. I don't think he normally explodes at other kids, but he does get frustrated and needs about 10 minutes to return to homeostasis. Earlier in the year I told him that when he starts to feel like he might loose his temper, to go for a short walk down the hall and back. His teacher said he's used this strategy a couple times this year. She has not voiced concern over his behavior - she just accepts him as he is I guess, which is nice. Although he will sometimes get "negative dojo points" in class (their behavior discipline system).
Very insightful comments though. I appreciate the thoughts.
Also, the comeback thing is kinda just for fun. I don't plan on telling off any parents.
