Petunia, I understand how frustrating this must be, and I hope you're able to find some answers soon. I'm not sure from what you've posted (here and in other posts) that I'd want to skip another grade before I understood more about what is driving the behaviors at home. If your ds was begging to skip, complaining of extreme boredom at school or if his teachers were telling you he had behavior issues at school and that they felt it might be tied to needing more challenge then I would definitely consider another grade skip. That doesn't seem to be what's happening though.
I'm looking at school as the problem because at least two people on this forum have brought it up, plus another friend, plus the DYS consultant.
I think it's easy to imagine folks here are going to bring up boredom as a possibility for behavior challenges - it does happen for kids who aren't appropriately placed in school, and of course, if that's the case for your ds, you'll want to advocate for a skip. BUT.... this is also an online forum where you're chatting with people who've never met your ds and who know nothing more about him than what they read in your posts, and who may very well be reading quickly and not putting a lot of thought into an individual situation. We care - we really do care - but we aren't experts and we don't know your son. Soooo.. that's my long-winded way of saying, I wouldn't consider a change based highly on what other parents advised me on a forum like this. I wouldn't discount it either, but I would think it through and look for verification from people (and professionals) who actually know and have spent time with my child. You do have a friend who's suggested it, and your DYS consultant suggested it... I'm not saying your ds *doesn't* need another grade skip, just suggesting that if it was my ds, I would probably also be looking for clues from his teachers, from the work he brings home, from what *he* says, possibly seeking advice from his nueropsychologist (or a counselor if he had one) etc.
I don't think it's hormones because the behavior problems have been going on for a couple of years, at least. No, I'm not sure it is learning related; I'm just trying to figure out WHAT it is.
One thing you mentioned in another post was meds - at one point (and maybe still?) your ds was, I think, on meds for something (ODD?). Being on meds can help kids, but it can also complicate the picture for a child who's struggling.
He's defintely putting in minimum effort.
This might be the case, but otoh, it might just *look* like he's putting in minimum effort, or he may be struggling with whatever it is and be convinced that he can't do more. I wouldn't necessarily assume he's putting in minimum effort, and I wouldn't assume that that "minimum effort" is due to lack of challenge.
I don't know when he'd fit in an online course but maybe it would motivate him.
My ds does really enjoy taking an online course each semester, entirely outside of school, even though his time outside of school is filled to the max with homework and other activities, and even though he doesn't get direct credit for it at school at this point in time (middle school). For him, it's providing a needed intellectual challenge as well as it's something he can expend extra effort on (i.e., time) and feel good about as he picks courses in his area of interest (science) and he does very well at them. They will help him accelerate in high school when the opportunity opens up. The key is - he's *motivated* to do the work and he really really *likes* it. If he didn't like the courses, it would be an incredible battle to get him to do the work.
Re the challenges of using computers for schoolwork - we make our kids sit in the same room with us while they do their homework. I don't sit right next to them (unless I am helping with something or have work I need to do on my own computer....).... but I keep them in the same room where I can see what they're working any time I want to.
I also wonder a bit about how "LOOOOONNNGGG" you say it takes him to do his homework... maybe there's something that could be done to help him get through it faster. It sounds like it's not difficult homework, so have you looked into whether or not it's taking him an unusually or unexpectedly long time to finish it? Do you think there's a possibility that something related to the homework is driving his behavior issues at home?
Sorry for the long ramble - I hope some of it helps!
Best wishes,
polarbear
