Pemberley, I hear you. Lots of special needs parents who have the experiences you've had end up with a variety of PTSD-- literally-- because the feeling that you can't protect your child from aggressors is so awful.
You won't be able to take a complete vacation from "managing," because you'll need to watch how they implement things and watch your DD's stress level and her outside therapies. I know you're not letting any of that go. But I'd encourage you to take really good care of yourself as well as your family. Get yourself some professional help if you feel the stress has worn you down too much (CBT is awesome for anxious parents as well as for anxious kids, it turns out, and you've had plenty of very good reasons to be anxious). Figure out what makes you feel most nurtured, and do that, till your bucket feels more full.
Hang in there.
DeeDee
