Hi Golfer26!
We are in a similar situation with our DS who is also in 4th grade. He was in our neighborhood public school for K-3, transferred to a private school for 4th, and will be homeschooled in the fall starting 5th grade.
The change from public school to private school was difficult. At the time, he begged to be homeschooled instead, but "I" wasn't ready for it. We assured him that he could maintain his friendships with his friends since we were still in the same neigborhood. It took a while for him to accept it, but he adjusted to the new school.
Just last month we told DS that he would be homeschooled in 5th grade. Again, he did not like it. For DS, the difficulties were with the change and feeling the loss of his friends. We explained to him that his "school" would be different, but that he would still be involved in the same activities and again, that he could maintain the friendships he's made.
When we explained what homeschooling would be like, he quickly got on board! We felt we needed to tell him earlier rather than later, so that he could prepare himself emotionally.
The reason why we made the first change was because in 3rd grade DS was losing his love of learning. He loved going to school because he got to be with his friends. School met his social needs, but not his academic needs. Although friendships are important, we did not want them to be DS' sole desire for going to school.
Fast forward to 4th grade, DS has quickly made new friends, but his issues with dysgraphia have made school miserable for him. He absolutely hates school and his friends don't seem to be a motivator for him to want to go to school anymore. A typical morning goes like this, "Time to wake up (jostle, jostle)!" DS replies, "I don't want to go to school today! Today is Thursday. I HATE Thursdays!!! We have to do comprehension questions on Thursday (moan and groan)!" We have to drag him out of bed every morning because he dreads school. This is a boy we NEVER had to wake up before.
Hopefully, homeschooling will be a better fit for him so that we can meet DS' need for academic challenge as well as make the necessary "accommodations" for his dysgraphia.
I don't know if I answered your questions or if I just rambled
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You know your son best and how he handles things emotionally. If he needs time to prepare, now would be a good time. Perhaps a Friday would be better so that he has the weekend to process the news. If you wait until summer vacation, you could still involve your son in the preparation for homeschooling. You could do all your background research and planning now, and then in the summer, bring your son into the process.
