Hi BooBoo
You might want to read "Is It a Cheetah?" By Stephanie Tolan. You can find it at her site here
http://www.stephanietolan.com/is_it_a_cheetah.htmI would have also not said anything in front of my child to the teacher but I've found with my daughter that when I acknowledge afterward, quietly and calmly, that the situation isn't all that comfortable or appropriate for her (especially the ongoing issues in school with not being challenged) it's hard for her to do this day after day and because she's a kid and is still learning self-control she did something that was of course not appropriate and disrespectful. But there is always tomorrow to try again. Kids also need to know that you are working on a situation for them that's not the best fit.
In theory the adult is the authority figure and the child must always obey and respect, but sometimes in reality (especially from the viewpoint of a child) the adult really isn't respecting the child by not providing them with appropriate challenge. Your son might have figured this out by now though he might not articulate it in appropriate words, so you could start the conversation.
It's very hard to walk that fine line between expecting absolute respect and saying it like it is.
Did you sense that this situation with the teacher is ongoing, or bubbling at the surface? I think if the teacher is angry or has angry undertones like she's taking it personally that it's not good for the situation. I remember lots of things kids did in school and kids can always tell the difference between an adult that takes things personally and ones that just saw us as kids, unfinished products, and that they were there to lead us in the right direction.
Anyway I hope this post stays active and other people can give your their ideas too.
