He is constantly pushing our buttons & boundaries & doing things he knows he shouldnt & when asked why he does them he says there is something wrong with his brain.
So give some examples here of exactly what he does to push buttons and boundaries, etc and exactly what what was happening just before and how you and other adults responded.
IMH(?)O, don't ever ever ask a kid why they did something they knew they weren't supposed to do. I can't answer why I go off my diet even though I'm an articulate, experienced grown up. The fact that you ask creates - in the mind of a child who can reason well above his years - the expectation that he can answer this question. He can't. I can't. You probably can't either. So he feels that there must be something wrong with his brain, naturally.
Lately I've been meditating to help myself not be that guy who 'speaks of going South and walks North.' I explain why I meditate as: We were all born with console controllers that don't work well. By meditating, I trade mine in for a better controller - one where I actually walk North when I push the North button.
It's true that other parents of more average children can say "Why did you do that?" and get the response they are looking for - a child who acts submissive and says sorry. Your kid is different in some way that has something to do with giftedness, likely with serious other issues, but when you ask that question, he EXPECTS to be be able to answer it in some way he finds meaningful. He believes that for every question there is an answer. He pays more attention to the content of the words than, as others would do, the emotional ritual that is going on. A lot of more average kids have scripts that say something like, "When mom gets mad because I did something wrong she says X, and if I do Y, she'll calm down and everything will be fine." and they know they don't understand the content of X - they are used to it - they don't understand 99% of what adults say, they just learn algorithm by experience.
Make sense?
Love and More Love,
Grinity
