Well, I volunteered in DS' first grade class for the first time today and did a math lab. Everything went well. The awkward part is that I recognized one of the kids there from DS' Kindergarten class last year.

I have alluded to some unpleasantness there before, but I don't think I ever posted the details here. You may have read them on the GT-FAMILIES list last June. Anyway, the boy I recognized is one of the ones whose family was involved in excluding DS from the end-of-year celebration.

Here's the letter that I found in DS' cubby last June: (K is the boy who is in his new first grade class this year.)

Quote
Dear "{DS' name}'s Parents",

My name is J. I'm G's father. I'm not sure if you know G. I know I've never met {DS}.

G and K {G's friend} have been attending {The School} since 2001, starting as babies just after the school opened. They've been here longer than any {School} employee. B and N {other friends} started just a year or so later.

This Friday marks a completion for them--for G and K more so than the others. G and K will be the first children to complete a full course at this school. As tradition dictates, we mark that completion with a ceremony, including ceremonial garb and a certificate.

We do that to indicate and savor the accomplishment. We give the children a sense of achievement to carry with them in their new beginning as First Graders. We in turn are rewarded with a pride different from all the other feelings of pride we've felt for our child. This completion marks the beginning of our pride in watching our child become an adult.

My son tells me {DS} will participate in the ceremony, but will not really graduate because he's really just visiting Kindergarten. He wonders if that is right--and so do I.

Several of the kindergarten parents have asked themselves and each other the same question.

The children know that {DS} in not really in their class. They know he won't really be in kindergarten until next year. They know he hasn't accomplished everything that they have. They know that when he participates in their graduation it will be pretend.

I would like you to know that your charade trivializes not only by child's accomplishment or the other kindergartener's, but yours as well--next year, when the accomplishment will be real. I began this letter with the intent to threaten and coerce you into doing what I think is right, but now I realize that perhaps you just didn't know there's really more to this ceremony than just dressing up. Perhaps you didn't know that it had meaning for all of US.

I respectfully ask you to consider what this moment really means to you and your son. I ask you to weigh that value against tainting OUR children's graduation.

I ask you simply to understand that you will be demonstrating reward for cheating to the entire 2007 kindergarten class by having your child participate in this graduation ceremony without basis.

I am asking you not to do that.

Sincerely,

J

We did not attend the "graduation." I was hoping to never see any of these people again... Now K is in DS' class again!? What next...

Cathy