Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional panicking about my son's lame school (long post)

This is my first post so please bear with me.

My son is gifted (the school tested him when he was four and they say his IQ is 154) and has Asperger Syndrome. He is in first grade at a "good" public school, and participates in the g/t program. But the school is not providing my son with strong academics (no science class at all, for example, no foreign language, etc.), and even the services he receives for his AS are weak (untrained paraprofessionals, under-educated special education teachers).

My son has no academic weaknesses that we know of (he's only seven, so we don't have a complete picture yet). He is way, way beyond grade level in science (all of which he has learned outside of school, of course), has decent handwriting, reads at or above grade level with fine comprehension, does very well in math. He has even started to get interested in drawing/art, which he never cared about before.

In school this year he has done mostly worksheets. He brings home from five to seven a day, and there may be others he does in school that I don't know about. They have reading groups, some math, occasional creative writing, then the teacher reads a chapter book to the class. Once she finishes reading the chapter book, she shows the movie of the book (if there is one) to the class. The g/t kids are pulled out once or twice a week to do bland, uninspired activities. My son is bored in school and hates it.

We have several fine private schools in our area, but none will accept my son (or if they do accept him, they will not necessarily keep him) because of the AS. It's a struggle just to get these private schools to admit him for little week-long summer camp classes (they balk or flat-out refuse to admit him, sight unseen).

We have one or two decent autism schools in our area, but they are for kids with more severe autism (nonverbal kids, for example).

My son does have special education needs, and they are social and behavioral (inattention, drifting off, refusal to do work or working too slowly). But when he is interested and engaged, he does very well. He becomes more difficult in the classroom when he is given boring work, or when asked to do the same work over and over again long after he has mastered it. I have asked about this, and the school insists he is NOT bored and that the class is plenty challenging. I notice that they tend to either give my son work that is way too easy or work that is way too hard (and they give him the really hard work without bothering to show him how to do it, then send the worksheet home with a snarky note saying, "He didn't know how to do this and needed help to finish.").

So that's the overview. My panic is about next year. We have done everything to find a new school. We are trying to move out of state for better schools, but haven't been able to find jobs in the towns where I know the schools are better. We have a younger child who will be starting kindergarten, so we have to consider his needs, too. The only advice I've gotten from people is "homeschool," which is just not an option for us at this time. I worry that my son is actually being damaged in his current school environment. I can honestly say that he has learned absolutely nothing in school this year. A totally wasted year. So on one hand I feel that continuing to send my son to this school borders on abuse. On the other hand, I don't see any other option. I know he benefits from the social interaction and being around peers, even if the social skills instruction itself (which is supposed to be taught by the special ed teacher) is poor. But the academics are weak and even the building itself is horrible (no windows in the classrooms). I would love to hear from other parents who have dealt with something like this. We just don't know what to do as far as next year (and beyond) is concerned.