I think your dd is in a very good place that you seem to get her so well, and that you do have such an open relationship and that she is able to be open about her feelings.
I totally agree with you about the meds--and am thankful that dd9 appears to take after her stereotypically German, detail-oriented, def. not adhd father (unfortunately perfectionism is still a driving force though for him and her). But we are now facing this challenge of adhd or not with my ds7, who has Down syndrome. So different ends of the spectrum, but same issues--what is causing the behaviour? Is it being in the tail of the bell curve (although my son really isn't the tail, just pretty far left)--and how to tell if it is really adhd.
I know that I could get meds for him tomorrow from the ped., but we are trying to make the most informed decision and can't get into the specialist whose opinion I respect the most until May.
Re: meds--anecdotally, fwiw--they def. make a difference for me. When I remember to take them!;) But it is an entirely different case to try to decide to give them (or withhold them from) to a growing child.
Oh--and for me re: the choice thing--when I was 11 I (very defiantly) *chose* not to do my pointless reading work and my parents got called in for a conference with the reading teacher(which resulted in...nothing. Could have been a chance for acceleration or differentiation or SOMETHING!)
When I was 17 and in AP English and just.couldn't get started on the 3 page papers we had to write each week (but then did a whole 1/4s worth in one weekend) it wasn't a choice. It was different.
