Last year, a very kind mom with several GT children at school took me aside and told me that my son was obviously GT and that I needed to advocate for him. I barely knew this lady at the time, but she came out of the blue & was so kind (like all of you posters!). Over the year, I followed all the required steps with this lady's help. During the eval & testing process, the school firmly maintained that DS's grade skip was his "intervention" and no other "intervention" was needed. However, there are a few other students who have been grade-skipped (including a few of this nice lady's kids), it was interesting to note that all those students had been tested & ID'd as GT. (DS was never even tested.) The school insisted that his IEP include the disclaimer that his "intervention" had been grade-skipping. However, because DS received no GT support and had no GT peers in his classes, he wasn't really enjoying school that much (even advanced work is fairly easy for him) and he had fewer & fewer friends with the same interests. If this lady had not come forward to help me, having observed my son over the years, I'm convinced he would have simply repeated 5th grade with no GT support from the school....
In hindsight, I know that we've failed him as parents in this key area, but - at the time - I knew nothing about GT and thought the school would surely have ID'd him if there was reason to do so.
... So he has done fine w/out GT program. However, it IS a wonderful program (once the child gets in) and it would have been a very nice opportunity for DS13.
Your thoughts/advice are welcome, too. I'm somewhat embarrassed to post because all my learning has shown some serious parental failure and we do actually try hard to be good parents.
Acknowledging a problem is the first step to overcoming it. So I congratulate you on posting even though it's embarrassing - that shows a lot of strength of character.
Your only error was believing the normal assumption that schools are the experts in educating out children and that they are fairly trying to help each child get the most of of their programs. This makes you naive, not bad.
I was naive too, and I get tremendous satisfaction from posting here and helping other families get over their naivet�. I'll bet that your 'out of the blue' friend had her naive days too.
You are in no way 'too late' for either of your sons, and you are certainly not to late to help any potential grandchildren they may bring you. There is very heavy 'genetic' component to giftedness so start thinking long term now!
Also - lots of us have been in the situation of your friend from 'out of the blue' so thanks for giving us a living example that sometimes it works out to just 'say what one sees.' Please give her a great big thank you from me, ok?
Sometimes I feel that I should keep my mouth shut in 'real life,' because, well, who wants to hear my perspective? So thanks for the encouragement to 'let it flap!'
Love and More Love,
Grinity
