Well said Minnie! My son was 'allergic' to condesention (still is) at a very young age.
I notice that 'chess for kids' clubs are often lead by fellows who take kids seriously and can notice intellectual strength. They also tend to be multiage. Our local one is even open to adult and kids. If you can find one led by a teacher who is more the 'quiet, gentle' sort you have a potential group activity.
I liked Chess for my sensory seeking kid, because it rewarded thinking before acting, and paying attention every second, and flexibility. Yum!
