Belle, so sorry to hear that the meeting went so poorly. I have to say I heartily agree with several of the previous comments:
1. Follow up with that gifted teacher - they often know the system from the inside and can provide sympathetic contacts at the next level up so you can build your case with insiders at a higher level than the school principal and guidance counselor.
2. I would have that tape recorder at every meeting from this point forward with every single staff member.
3. Even though it sounds like you have decided this school is not the place, please write a letter documenting the discussion and the results of the meeting. In that letter, I still think you should ask for what you think you want - 1 or even 2 grade skip, accelerated classes, independent study, etc. Explain why their objections from the meeting are baseless (no additional cost). Reference the procedural safeguards - you should get a copy at every meeting you go to - attach a copy with your letter with the relevant sections highlighted, along with a copy of the relevant sections of the School Progression Plan.
I suggest this because even if you abandon the idea of public school you may come back to it, next year or the next, or the next. Rather than starting over each year, build your record as formally as possible and it becomes apparent over time to anyone that they school system is uncooperative and not meeting their requirements.
One of my great frustrations has been that the schools I am familiar with don't seem to use any grade-based assessment - no MAP, no other year-end assessment, but they live and breathe that FCAT. At my school they do pre-tests all year long and are still doing post-tests this month! On the other hand, the results are not volunteered and they act like you are butting it when you ask for them. I'd be willing to bet that 90% ( or more) of the parents at my school don't even know about these assessments or how their kids are doing.
In the letter I would include a specific request that they identify what tests or assessments would be acceptable to demonstrate mastery for the various standards needed to determine an appropriate grade placement. Put them on the spot - if what you have isn't good enough, ask them to tell you what is. Then they should give you something to work with or basically admit they don't have any way to assess any students at grade level.
I'm available if you want to PM - I'll be sure to check in this week.
