OHGrandma,
Good for you for using your experience to guide you! I am sure that you did the best you could have given the times and the availible information. Remember that it's totally reasonable to send one's kids to school and expect them to be appropriatly educated. Reasonable, unfortunatly, doesn't always mean that this will work out. Also, I think that there was much more social pressure back then to 'leave it to the professionals.'
I think the best way to help your neighbors is to talk a bit about what you are going through as you go. They will react and show you how large 'a bit' you can share without freaking them out. I found that I was trying to hide my difference, but that all my friends were quite aware of it.
I did sit each of them down and serve tea and explain that I have spent major energy hiding this part of myself and I have decided not to hide anymore. My little handful of IRL friends were totally unsuprised, and welcoming.
When a new friend came along after this, I forgot to have that talk. A few months later, she make tea for me, because she had been tossing and turning up at night due to her worries that my son had special needs and maybe I didn't know. She's the first local friend who saw his difference for what it was and came after me to 'do something!' I treasure that memory.
And yes, an Academic Booster Club would be wonderful, and every town should have one!
Smiles,
Grinity
