We found that our little perfectionist (DD 3) was not willing to give potty training a try after having an accident and our many attempts was met with resistance. It wasn't until first taking away the pull-ups because pull-ups are glorified diapers and talking to her about the need to practice that we had a break through. And just to clarify this was no means the old idea of practice makes perfect but rather practicing helps us reach our goal. In two days she was trained as far as pee but still had issues with poop. But with the new idea of practice under her belt she was willing to sit longer on the toilet. She became seriously constipated. But (this sounds so wrong) thankfully during all of this she caught some bug and had severe diarrhea. Poor thing ... let me tell you ... having to poop a lot helped her practice A LOT and by that first day of her illness she had it down. Since then we have had no accidents and my independent child is all about doing it herself. Wiping is her thing. When I know she is pooping I always go in to check and 8 out of 10 times she has done a great job. It still shocks me how quickly she potty trained once she accepted she needed too. A week later she was fully potty trained for day and night.
As for your daughter ... it looks like you have received some great advice. I would only add that perhaps you need to eliminate the crutch of pull ups. The minute we removed them as an option our DD accepted what she needed to do.
