My first post was rushed and I wanted to elaborate. We used to take things away when my kids didn't do what they were supposed to. DS10 forgot the trash barrels? No TV. DS14 didn't clean the bathroom? No sleepovers etc. You get the idea.
Now the kids get up every morning with a clean slate. Over the course of the day they earn their rewards. Schholwork, chores etc give them access to what they want. If they make the choice not to do their chores, then there is no TV, or Computer or whatever. The difference is that it puts the choice in their hands. I don't nag or stomp or get frustrated anymore. The secret is is to use the thing they like best to inspire them to make the right choice. Even my 3 and 4 yo boys take their plates to the sink and put their clothes in the hamper.
It makes for self correcting behavior and even though the end result (ie no TV) is the same, in their minds it's not because one is controlled by you "mean mom won't let me watch TV". The other is controlled by their own personal choice "If I want to watch TV, I need to get this done".
It's amazing how well this works.
Last edited by BWBShari; 06/30/09 11:45 AM. Reason: spelling
