J, K, well said.
((applause))
I am so pleased that your kids won't go through what I allowed my son to go through, and that you won't have to deal with the difficult outcomes - loss of respect for athority, loss of respect for hard work, loss of respect for peers - that we are now in the long slow process of trying to reverse. It seems to be working, but it's a slow process.
I do think that our Perfectionism says that we should have all the answers and 'get it right.' Realistically I'm hoping that I can do well-enough by my son, that he can 'get it right' for my future grandchildren.
I agree that if we can keep character development first - which means reasonable educational fit for these (and maybe all) children - and demonstrate that we care and are making an effort, that that will be enough.
As for worries for the future, for me this goes right back to the existential questions we've always wrestled with - right? I consider myself lucky to be able to believe in a higher power who has more insight into the situation than I do. Then I can remind myself to do my legwork and turn the rest over. I also find the idea that today is the only day we have to be important. Yes, make plans and have goals, but 95% of my attention needs to be on today - work or play.
My hunch is that when it feels too heavy, remember who your supports are and go to them. We are all at the Frontier together - trying to figure out how to accommidate our children's special needs with very few social supports and fewer tools. It is so inspiring to see some of the parents here who have done so much with what little there is! Yippee!
Trinity
