There's DS11's story.
His handwriting was "ugly" but age appropriate in first grade, age 6, summer birthday, so younger than most males in his class by 6 months. In second grade we started to hear complaints that he was writing "one word" answers to his worksheets when the teacher knew that he knew that he was supposted to repeat the the question to start the sentence of the answer. This took place on worksheets that were geard for 5th graders, becasue, although they have no gifted program, the school started a quiet experiment to keep 10 strong reader boys together. Note that all of these boys except my DS had been heldback before entering kindergarten, so they were over a year older, but no one was talking about that. They didn't tell me about their little plan. He was in the top reading group, which seemed normal to me. He was reading "Harry Potter" at home. While I was grateful that he was being challenged with harder books, and proud that he was the teacher's "lifeline" during class discussions, I was very unhappy about the beating his self esteem was taking because his handwriting was now a wee-bit below average for his age, and markedly below average for his peer group. The teacher, who cared deeply about him, was of the mind set that "advanced in one area, means advanced overall" and "He can do it somedays, so why can't he do it every day, if only he would try a bit harder." Soon the meetings started, as the school suspected ADHD, and focused on "immaturity" and "spoiled" while I think he was both bored with the "thinking stuff" and overwhelmed with the demands of the skills.
I call it "Great Big Head supported by teeny-weeny Neck." with the inflection borrowed Robin Williams' Genie, who complained of, "Phenomenal cosmic powers--teeny-weeny living space.
So, we were introduced to the world of "Asynchronous Development" but still, even after getting the IQ/Acheivment scores that got us into YSP, didn't have the word for it, or understand just how gifted gifted could be. And I started bribing him to learn to touch type.
I'm dredging this all up, Zia'sMom, to show that even though we can appreciate that a child is many different ages, the teachers tend to have a "2nd graders must develop neatly spaced printing" and "3rd graders must learn cursive and memorize their times tables" way of looking at children. A child who is not on the expected timetable may be looked at as a child who has "something wrong with them." My child picked up this (not subtle) vibe and internalized his teacher's opinion of himself. In my experience for kids who are highly asynchrounous in their development, it is a good idea to talk to the child about this, and compare their various developments to their friends, because the dissonance of "I know that I understand the book better then my classmates because I always know the answer during discussion time, but all my papers come back with "x" and baby handwriting while the other kid's papers have "c" and long beautiful handwriting. Zia'sMom, I hope you are shaking you head with pity and feeling confused about what that must be like. Lots of PG kids are advanced socially, emotionally and small motor skills-wise, and then the accelerations are smooth. I hope your boy is like that.
Does your son touch type? How many words/minute? My guess is that 35 is the lower limit for being able to use typing as a tool. DS11 didn't reach that level until he was 9, and then he quickly zoomed to about 90 wpm, thanks to a new interest in Runescape. When he started 5th, and then 6th grade at his new school, I insisted that they let him type EVERYTHING, except math. I explained that for him to show the teachers who he is, he must be allowed to keyboard. We are allowing him to bring the family laptop to school so that this is less of an imposition. It took a month, but they see my point. At age 11, he is mature enough to start is "answer" sentences with the question, although it still seems "dumb" to him, even when penciling, but he is still likely to "leave well enough alone" when penciling while when he has a keyboard, he will wax poetic. ((wonder where he gets it from? wink))
In 3rd and 4th the teachers allowed him to use the classroom computer at times, and would have provided him with an alphasmart if he was willing. To DS11, using an alphasmart would have been an admission of having a disability, as well as socially difficult. Those old 2nd grade wounds are still close to the surface. As late as last summer, DS was telling me that his handwriting was "fine" and that he didn't need to use the computer. Thankfully that attitude has melted away, and now he says just as forcefully that he "must use the keyboard."
Other accomidations I have heard of kids getting include, a notetaker, a scribe, dictating their report into a tape recorder. In some families they parent sets a timer, and after X minutes, specified by the teacher as how much time she wants devoted to homework, the parents signs the sheet and demands that the child leave the desk. This is a good alternative because it avoids the slippery slope of "Ma, I don't want to do this homework because I already know the material." 15 minutes of busywork isn't going to ruin anyone's day, and doesn't set up an adversarial "How dare you give my child hours and hours of senseless homework!" between parent and teacher.
I am quite aware of families that have radicle acceleration and wouldn't dream of asking for any accomidation of any kind. They believe that the child will do best in the long term if they are treated exactly like everyone else in their new grade. I think so much depends on the child, this would have meant misery for us, but this approach seems appealing for those whoes kids can pull it off.
Smiles,
Trinity
