At the risk of sounding cynical I have to interject that we all are subjected to labels throughout our lives. Others give us labels and we give ourselves labels. I agree with Kriston - the "name" doesn't really matter. It's what you do that matters, not what you call it.
I have found that the more I verbalize the word "gifted" the less foreign it sounds. And the more comfortable I get with that word the more comfortable I am with advocacy and figuring out what to do. I see the same thing happen with those I work with who are coming to terms with new diagnoses of disabilities. Until a new stroke patient comes to terms with the re-definition of themselves as "a stroke survivor" and all the residual effects of the stroke they struggle with denial and adjustment issues. They don't advocate for themselves, they fight the reality of their situation and struggle with emotional responses. You can draw the same parallel for any disability or label.
It is what is. If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck and swims like a duck, then it must be a duck. Once you realize it's a duck you can make that duck happy, because you finally stop treating him like he's a chicken!
And yes, to get back to the initial question, I have questioned my parenting abilities with each and every kid! Each child is a unique being with his/her unique needs. We have seven kids between us (DH and I) and questions always come up about what to do, how to handle this situation or that one. Just last night we had an intense discussion about MrWiggly and what to do for school. We had to remember that there are other children to consider also. Our decisions for him impact the whole family. Parenting is not a task to be undertaken lightly! But you just do the best you can with what you've got. And always strive to be better. That's all anyone can ask of themselves.
