I would suggest not worrying about being "that parent". Represent him accurately and they will see you are not going special snowflake on them.
Is kindergarten mandatory in your state?
I would ask for written acceleration policies and written description of their gifted/talented programming.
I would ask how students are identified for gifted/talented and acceleration. Find out specifically what tests they use. If they use IQ screening, you may want to have private neuropsychological testing done to ensure it is done individually, not rushed. My son bombed an ACT because he was rushing to get back to his classroom for an activity. However neuropsych evaluations can be cost prohibitive and less accurate in younger children, so it may not be worth it yet.
I would ask when the gifted/talented program starts. You can expect it typically doesn't start until 3rd grade in most districts. This is a cost-saving measure since children who have "enriched environment" will regress to the mean by 3rd grade which results more accuracy in identifying gifted/talented children based upon acheivement testing.
I would expect to hear a lot of talk about social and emotional development in the elementary years as a reason not to grade-skip accelerate. It IS an issue, but my experience is that their anxieties were unfounded and put my son in a worse social situation staying with age peers.
I would also want to know how they monitor accelerated students and whether the school administrators perceive accelerations as inflexible, as in, if they are willing to reverse a skip that isn't going well.
