I recall fielding all those rude remarks when we entered DS10 early at the time. Yes, people immediately get defensive and feel a need to lash out at you to put you or your child down. I used to say we followed the recommendation by both his preschool and grade school teachers (always put it on the experts!) and if people wouldn't leave it alone, entered in a spirited discussion on how age grouping needed to be more flexible for both kids who needed to move on and kids who needed more time, because every child is different and has different needs blah blah blah...it seemed to help ending these potentially contentious conversations on a positive note.
It was such a relief to leave the closet entirely when DS10 was in fourth grade and everyone and their dog would ask where the fourth graders were going to to go for secondary school in fifth grade. The only gifted program in town is an hour away from where we live and across the state line and literally every other option would be closer, so whenever I named the school people who knew DS10 immediately twigged that we were looking at the gifted program there. Now, when people frown In confusion as to why we make DS10 commute there, I have to explain there was a special program he wanted, and name it if people keep asking. Using the g word. Without cringing and apologizing. Now DD6 will go into third grade in fall and again, now that it's official I just say so, though I do say her teacher insisted if people press for more (I still put it on the experts!)
I and my parents got it all and much worse when I skipped a grade. It's really getting better.
Having a child with a severe disability for a third really helps developing a thick skin. This is who we are, outliers in every respect. My children do not like it, but they will have to develop the thick skin as well because there is absolutely no hiding or pretending for any of them that we are a normal family (the wheelchair tends to tip people off, LOL!)
Last edited by Tigerle; 07/17/17 11:56 PM.
