I am frequently struck by the way labels that were devastating when I was a kid have become badges of honour now, thanks to Bill Gates and friends. My son's most beaming smiles turn on when he's wearing his shirt "Come to the Geek side, we have pi". He, however, seems have have decided as early as grade 2 that he couldn't possibly fit in, and has gone out of his way to embrace/ flaunt his eccentricities (hair, clothes, interests, violent opposition to hockey....)
With a child who is trying to fit in, maybe, as Dude suggested, you can help her see the larger positive in a wider range of role models. There are tons of very visible, very smart people out there, making a world of difference and flaunting how different they themselves are. Their creativity, their success, and what makes them interesting is very much tied up with what makes them different. It's easy to forget such people in a world that places so much value on conformity, but they lead almost every field of endeavour. I wonder if you can find some such people in areas she's interested in, and help her see the wonderful in their different? (Not to mention the humour in all the pseudo-geek wannabes trying to imitate and be those folk they wouldn't have been caught dead with in our day! Revenge of the Nerds had no idea what real vengeance was going to end up looking like.)
As a totally different random thought, a story: over the last year DS had a 10-11 year old female friend (with whom he seemed to share a brain) who started in a gifted class in grade 5, and transformed from a Minecraft lover with all boys for friends, to a total girly-girl. I think for the first time, she had girls she could actually relate to - but their interests were still much stronger in areas like writing and art, and so we saw a great deal of turning away from male friends and more typical boy interests like Minecraft while she tried to find her own particular way in this new world of unexpectedly interesting female peers. Is it possible your DD's sense of being weird may be not exactly about dumbing down, but maybe triggered by changing, more girly interests among the girls, and she's trying to figure out where she fits in this new dynamic? With the grade skip, she may be experiencing a much less gradual transition into pre-teen life than your DD11.
