*hugs* You've gotten lots of great advice here so far!
Honestly, it doesn't sound like your son is being challenged in school at all. Your afterschooling (spelling and worksheets) might help a bit, but he's probably exhausted from holding it in at school all day. Has he requested this extra work, and is he willing to do it?
When DS was having problems in school and refusing to do schoolwork and homework, it was easy for the teachers to say stuff like, "This should be easy for him, if he just sat down and did it." So here's the scenario I came up with:
Imagine you have to sit in training meetings all day long, with all the lectures and work geared for someone 50+ IQ points below your own. You aren't allowed to pull out your phone to check email or FB. Mostly you don't get to choose the training topics. For a time each day you get to split off from the group to do some work more suited to your level, but then it's back to the group. There is a lot of repetition and busywork. And in order to do some of the more interesting work, you still have to finish the boring stuff. Every. single. day.
You'd probably go nuts from boredom and frustration. And if you're 6, you might not have the language to express, or even the life experience to know, what is wrong and why. But *something* is wrong, something needs to change, and you've got to express it somehow.
DS was having these problems, except instead of waiting until he got home, he misbehaved at school. He hated having to go to school, and resented me and DH for making him go. We pulled him out of school last spring. Homeschooling has been the best decision we made, and DS's behavior has improved immensely.
