blackcat, I'll second the concerns that the issue here isn't really what to say to your ds but rather how do you get him placed appropriately or how do you get him appropriately challenging work?
I'll also add - I've heard for years from my friends, each of their kids is going to have one not-so-great teacher during their school career. It's possible you've landed there early.
But what do I say to DS? Particularly for some of the station activities that are way too easy?
Please know, this is just me, but this is what we've told our kids in these situations. They need to do the work even if it's mind-numbingly boring and way too easy. That's a part of being at school, you do the work you are asked to do (that's also a part of life after school). This is *not* the same as me saying as a parent - you do this, it's too easy, and I don't care. I *absolutely* care, and I show that by advocating for more appropriately challenging work. I also ask my children, what is easy about the work, what would you rather do or learn, can you think of a way to make it more challenging. But I also think it's important for them to do it for two reasons: first, it's ok for them to understand that they are smarter than what's being taught, but it's not ok for them to think they are allowed to get around work because of it. They still need to respect the teacher and do what he/she says (while in the background their parents do their best to help get them appropriately challenged). Second reason - if they aren't doing the work, the teacher can always come back at you and say your child can't advance farther etc until they've done the work and shown mastery, or a teacher might turn the situation around and try to say it's evidence of a behavior issue. So we tell our kids - the way to get past this is to work through it.
For homework she is sending home 5+2 stuff, knowing that it is way too easy but says she wants him to work on his handwriting. So by the time DS does that, he is tired of writing (he most likely has dysgraphia)
I can't remember - do you have an evaluation scheduled for your ds? If you think he's dysgraphic, the absolutely best thing you can do right now is to have him evaluated and either get a diagnosis or rule out the diagnosis. Once he has the official diagnosis, you can request accommodations - and for a dysgraphic student, it's so very important to both separate out the writing from other types of assignments, as well as making sure your ds isn't being forced to practice handwriting skills in a way that is ultimately useless due to his dysgraphia. Instead you need to be moving forward planning how to accommodate.
and he does not want to do the Singapore math workbook (2 grade levels ahead) I bought for him.
Has he actually asked to be after-schooled in math? Some kids just really aren't up for it, and no matter how inappropriate his current math level is at school I wouldn't worry about pushing the after-school math if it's not something he's genuinely interested in and excited about.
I feel like telling him to skip the 5+2 math even though the teacher wants it done, and just do the Singapore math.
FWIW, even though I mentioned above that I would tell my kids to complete the classwork they are asked to do in class, I didn't worry if they didn't do the work sent home in their early years of elementary school, especially if it was work I knew they knew how to do. I didn't make a big deal about it with the teacher - didn't tell the teacher we weren't doing it because it was too easy, I just let my kids not do it *IF* they seemed tired, frustrated, annoyed about it etc. If they weren't fighting doing it, I had them complete it even if it was way below the level they were capable of. If it's all truly too easy, and if your child is really interested and wants to after-school and is asking for it, I can't see that doing the extra easy homework from school would be so tiring he wouldn't want to do the Singapore math. I'm guessing there's something more going on here - either dysgraphia or possibly lack of interest in doing extra math or maybe it's the Singapore method or workbook or whatever. I'm not personally familiar with Singapore, but having three different children I have seen three completely different personalities re what method my kids like to use to learn math.
I expect this is going to be a continuing theme with every class/teacher and I'm wondering how other people deal with it.
We've seen advocating as a continuing theme, but I would set myself up early on expecting that work below my child's level at school *had* to be a continuing theme. I'd do what I can to research all my options for schooling. And with your ds, since you suspect dysgraphia, I'd get an eval so I had good hard data and knew for sure if it is or isn't an issue.
Good luck!
polarbear
