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Resist any temptation to be pleased when they do an entire exercise sheet with no trouble: remember to be disappointed, because it means they didn't get a chance to learn with optimal efficiency that time. Celebrate struggle (when it eventually leads to success, but even when it doesn't). Point out progress - let them experience finding something easy now that they remember finding hard before. Etc.

All this is great advice!

DD has heard many times that everything is easy, you're not learning enough. I think she actually believes it now.

This may sound dorky, but we actually have a few songs that we use in our family when the perfectionist monster strikes. One is along the lines of "If at first you don't succeed--try, try again.." and goes on from there about how not getting it right the first time means you have something to learn, etc. Als, I still sing them this, which I used to sing when they were little bitty toddlers, although I sorta camp it up now:



This could be totally annoying--not used when they are really worked up!