You certainly aren't pathetic! The "rules" are put into action differently in each school district, from my experience. Hard to know what to expect.
In some districts, testing for special education simply doesn't get done if the child is achieving at or above grade level. The district balks, the teachers say there's no problem, someone says the child is "doing fine" and tells the parents to relax. I've never worked with a district that allowed OT to be the only service the child received under an IEP. OT services often depend on the availability of a therapist. Some districts employ their own OTs but many contract for services. It often comes down to a supply and demand issues or a financial issue for the district. Sad, but true. Sometimes I've seen a child with lots of issues that would respond well to OT but they only get 20 minutes a week written on the IEP because the school therapist is only at that school one day per week and already has 16 kids on her caseload there.
The other hard part is for an OT to justify that a gifted child who is achieving at or above grade level needs OT to remediate handwriting issues that are asynchronous but "average." When the child tests out with a large discrepancy you really have to make a case for how it impacts the child. Not all OTs know how. Not many educational people understand the impact of that on the school experience. So, basically, OT can be hard to get in the schools!
