My little one also sounds similar, specially the with other people she is well behaved but walk into the house it all changes. The one thing that I have done that kind of works, is to time out me or the cat, or the toy rather than the kid.
Cricket- our two older ones sound so similar and some of our journey.. I too in the beginning had no idea of gifted and the surviving until they are five... and she now is treated as older by all partly due to looks and partly due to her conversational abilities.
