Thanks for all of the replies! Part of our concern on "missing out" on the elite college experience has to do with the experience that my wife and I both had. We attended decent public high schools (that offered plenty of AP classes) but neither of us were ever really challenged in HS. Both of us then went on to attend an Ivy league school and discovered an environment where significant numbers of people with similar levels of intellectual curiosity were the norm rather than the exception. It is that social environment that I would like my son to experience, though at age 18 rather than at 14. I guess that I figured being a commuter student at a decent 2nd tier school would keep him academically challenged, and we would treat it sort of like high school (just with more responsibility and freedom). Perhaps grad school isn't the ideal way for an 18 year old with a bachelors degree to have a traditional "Freshman" experience, but we are truly struggling finding alternatives.
