Just realized that I didn't really answer your question - just provided you with procedural information. How did someone come up with the ADHD label? Has he already been evaluated? If not, then he should be. Other than for classification purposes, the diagnosis, in my view, kind of doesn't matter. What does matter are the problems your son is having. For example, if it is an issue with executive function, then he needs to be taught to manage time, organize and plan, among other things. A neuropsych evaluation can help bolster the argument that he 'can't do those things rather than 'won't,' and executive function problems can occur in both ADHD and Aspergers populations. Same thing with the need for OT and speech - if he needs it, he needs it and if the Aspergers label gets your son what he needs, then take the label and run with it.
My daughter was evaluated twice. Once in middle school and then in high school. She didn't believe that she had disabilities and I didn't really understand the nature of her challenges. I have learned a great deal in these past 5 years and so has my daughter. Perhaps it was because she was a few years older at the time of the second evaluation or perhaps it was her relationship with the evaluator - I suspect the latter, - my daughter gained insight into herself and was better able to listen to the strategies that she was being taught - she came to recognize herself. We never backed down on searching for an education that emphasized her gifts and love of learning. This year, she has progressed for the first time in ages and has had positive experience upon positive experience. Must go remind her to do her laundry!
