Hi,

I've seen so many times now posts and articles that say that the gifted child must be challenged or they will not acquire a work ethic, study skills, etc, that I feel the need to play devil's advocate.

I'm MG, maybe HG, but certainly not PG. I coasted all the way through school, a bit of challenge in later high school but it was not a hard high school, I was a big fish in a little pond. My parents thought it was important to do okay but they didn't care about a top grade, they didn't go to parent conferences, volunteer, etc. They didn't seem to think that my performance was something they could affect beyond asking me if my homework was done. They did themselves value learning highly, which showed in career choices, the games we played (trivial pursuit, complicated card games), trips we took, etc -- but they didn't expect school to provide or reinforce a work ethic.

Very selective college, I worked hard for sure but still crammed before exams. Post graduate got too hard for cramming to work and the first fall I got a D before I realized the amount of continuous effort required. A teacher asked me if I might have a learning disability. In response I joined some study groups, got organized, and did great after that.

In fact I think the coasting helped me. It let me see school as something apart from my self-identity. It minimized me feeling like I need someone else to instruct me. I did a lot of other things as a kid, played a lot, read a huge amount, built a lot of things, was pulled out of school regularly for trips or minor illness. In post graduate work I wasn't afraid to skip some of my school's class-time to take some outside classes, giving me a breadth that later served me well (it seemed to shock my classmates at the time, skip class, what if my gradepoint average dropped?)

I think one really has to look at the family's characteristics and child's temperament before deciding a child needs to work hard at formal schooling from the age of 5 in order to succeed in life.

It seems like sometimes a need for challenge to build character or study skills is used as an excuse to get appropriate level work. Which is fine as long as one realizes that at least occasionally this is just an excuse. For truly PG kids perhaps more often a necessity, as they might not encounter challenge any other way.

I'm trying to figure out what the specific characteristics are that let me coast without damaging my ability ramp up my effort when needed.

One thing may be an ability to deeply focus on something one is interested in. If I get interested in something I could do it for days straight (that's now, more for hours straight as a 5 year old). Another is perfectionism or self criticism, so that I'm very aware of the quality of what I'm doing and even if I start something the night before I don't settle for pretty good. (I have a teenage relative right now hitting a wall academically because he's so un-self-critical he doesn't care to turn in work that is excellent if he can get by with work that is so-so).

To other successful coasters out there... what was your family like or what about you made it fine to coast? Do all gifted 5 and 6 year olds need to be academically challenged by their classwork?

Polly